[And Chuuya is not about to go down in a lover's suicide. Sorry Dazai, live out your fantasies elsewhere.
But like this, chest-to-chest? This is okay. Chuuya thinks his rapid heartbeat might be a bit too obvious, but he's trying to stay cool. This is fine.]
[This is said as he gives up on the dancing pretense and pulls his free arm around Dazai in a hug. Except it's not a hug, he's just holding Dazai against him to keep him from escaping, shut up their hands aren't stuck together and preventing Dazai's escape.]
I told you, didn't I? You're mine. You don't get to run away anymore, you don't get to die. Not until I tell you it's ok.
[ He can't really see Chuuya's face, but he can feel him move, and at first he was thinking the other was going to push him or pull away to yell. He wasn't expecting Chuuya to actually put his arm around him or those words.
He'll give an exaggerated sigh, but doesn't make a move to pull away. ]
So bossy. Don't you have this backwards? You're supposed to be mine, Chuuya.
[ His...whatever ]
I already told you I was going to see where this leads.
[ He isn't used to equal, but the last couple of months have shown him a number of new things.
There's a pause before he buries his face against Chuuya's shoulder for a second. ]
Okay okay. I'm yours and you're mine.
[ Chuuya knows him enough to already know how broken he is. He's seen his memories and the worked together already. If he really wants to hold on after all of that... then he'll let him. He did say he was following this through. ]
[Dazai is extremely broken, but so is Chuuya, so they can both work on that together maybe. 'Maybe' because they're both so broken it might be a foregone conclusion, but Chuuya is still going to try.]
And you're gonna see all there is to life, and I guess we'll do a lot of 'firsts' together too.
[First time throwing Dazai into a lake might be next.]
Honestly our first time kissing kinda sucked, it only got better later. Maybe that means we gotta do this stuff a lot of times too to get better at it.
Mammon made a ruckus about playing spin the bottle one night on the dead side. When it was Anya's turn, the bottle landed on me. She was intending to kiss my cheek but she stumbled forward and she wound up kissing me on the lips instead.
He seems obsessed with people being lewd. Did you see how he reacted on the bus when he heard about the sex demons and how another version of me was turned into a sex demon? He told me to 'control my urges'.
[Chuuya is snickering as he recounts this story. He was mad at the time, but it's hilarious in retrospect.]
Like I wasn't even thinking about doing 'lewd things' until he told me not to. Now I just wanna piss him off.
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shortforever) wrote2020-06-06 12:12 pm
more CW: Dazai
[And Chuuya is not about to go down in a lover's suicide. Sorry Dazai, live out your fantasies elsewhere.
But like this, chest-to-chest? This is okay. Chuuya thinks his rapid heartbeat might be a bit too obvious, but he's trying to stay cool. This is fine.]
all the CW: Dazai
Dying with someone doesn't sound all that bad, but I also don't mind the idea of your hands around my neck.
[ Lover's suicide or Lover's murder. Either seems good. ]
Though I did say I'll try living to see where this will go.
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Good. Because I'm not gonna dance with a living corpse.
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But it's fine cause that's painful anyways which is a no in his book ]
You do know you're the one that plays a part in making it interesting.
[ That sure is a way to tell someone they might be part of why he wants to give living a chance. ]
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[He's kind of wondering if Dazai will ever discard him, but he also doesn't actually want to know the answer to that.]
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Just like I know you wouldn't bother with me unless it was worth something to you. What are you getting from this, Chuuya?
[ He might but Dazai also thought he himself was already discarded back in the graveyard ]
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Why didn't he leave Dazai dead and buried?]
I mean. Making out is kinda nice.
[It's not the only reason, and it's not even the main reason. It's just the one that's easiest to put to words.]
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You were already calling me yours before the making out, Chuuya.
[ He's here to call you out. ]
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Well you died and you're an idiot. You need someone to look after you.
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Chuuya is the bigger idiot.
[ Said without any real annoyance in his tone. He's comfy like this. ]
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[This is said as he gives up on the dancing pretense and pulls his free arm around Dazai in a hug. Except it's not a hug, he's just holding Dazai against him to keep him from escaping, shut up their hands aren't stuck together and preventing Dazai's escape.]
I told you, didn't I? You're mine. You don't get to run away anymore, you don't get to die. Not until I tell you it's ok.
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He'll give an exaggerated sigh, but doesn't make a move to pull away. ]
So bossy. Don't you have this backwards? You're supposed to be mine, Chuuya.
[ His...whatever ]
I already told you I was going to see where this leads.
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[That does leave the question of Reito's place in everything, but they can figure that out later.]
The point is, I don't let go of what's mine.
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There's a pause before he buries his face against Chuuya's shoulder for a second. ]
Okay okay. I'm yours and you're mine.
[ Chuuya knows him enough to already know how broken he is. He's seen his memories and the worked together already. If he really wants to hold on after all of that... then he'll let him. He did say he was following this through. ]
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And you're gonna see all there is to life, and I guess we'll do a lot of 'firsts' together too.
[Like 'first dance'.]
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If it's anything like kissing, then I suppose I can look forward to it, Chuuya.
[ Time to see what other firsts they can do. ]
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Honestly our first time kissing kinda sucked, it only got better later. Maybe that means we gotta do this stuff a lot of times too to get better at it.
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[ Sometimes you have to sacrifice making it good for making it fast. ]
It was better than my first at least, even with the plastic in the way. Though I do think practice makes perfect.
[ He's down with trying it lots and lots of times. ]
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[Give him this knowledge, Dazai.]
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[ It was dumb ]
Ah, you should have seen Asch's face though.
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Holy shit, is that why he's so mad about you all the time?
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[ If Chuuya thinks Dazai is shitty at him, he should hear about what he's done to Asch. ]
He thought I was lewd and would corrupt Anya. While Anya wanted to spend time with me because she knew I wouldn't look at her like that.
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You destroyed him, Dazai. Goddamn. No wonder he likes to pretend you don't exist.
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He largely did it to himself. It was pretty sad after a while.
[ Still didn't stop him from pulling shit on him though. ]
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[Chuuya is snickering as he recounts this story. He was mad at the time, but it's hilarious in retrospect.]
Like I wasn't even thinking about doing 'lewd things' until he told me not to. Now I just wanna piss him off.
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