[what feeling is this hug meant to express. . .? sympathy, a desire to comfort, sorrow, a bit of grief of his own. . . this mansion sucks, and three weeks in a row of dead bodies-- three dead bodies this time-- takes a toll on a person]
[so even when Chuuya doesn't hug back. . . Akira's grip on his roommate merely tightens, fingers balling into fists at the back of his shirt. he can't see those tears due to hug, but that's okay]
[It sure does, and part of Chuuya feels like he should be the one supporting Akira. And yet, when he reaches up his hands to try and do something, anything, he just ends up holding onto Akira's arms.]
I-
[Well, that voice crack betrays him right there. He's definitely crying now.]
[Chuuya. . . Akira has, up until now, avoided asking about Chuuya's life before the mafia. getting these little glimpses into it are. . . well. difficult]
[. . . well, Akira looks a bit sheepish at that. though he doesn't draw Chuuya back in for a hug, he doesn't move his hands from his roommate's shoulders, either]
I. . . ah. Sorry-- I guess I should've asked first.
[but it seemed-- it felt-- like the right thing to do]
[that address doesn't make sense but it's okay AKIRA'S SUPER SPENT. so he's just gonna crawl inside as well and not even bother to curl underneath the blankets before he buries his face into the pillow]
[That second bit, though. With the worst of the morning past him now, he actually feels a little silly for reacting so strongly. He's tougher than that, damnit! He's the one who should be looking out for others.]
Yeah, I'll be fine. I've been doing the 'on my own, taking care of myself' thing since I was seven, so I'm pretty good at it by now.
But are you gonna be okay? No offense, but you're a huge softie.
The Metaverse is a world made up of human cognition. Palaces are castles created by a person's extremely distorted thoughts and desires.
Say you have a mafia boss who sees the entirety of a city as his personal bank. In the Metaverse, that city would appear to be a part of his bank world, the bank world being his Palace.
And at the center of that bank is the mafia boss's Treasure. The core of his own personal bank world. Remove it, and the entire distortion falls apart.
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Date: 2020-03-07 02:57 am (UTC)[so even when Chuuya doesn't hug back. . . Akira's grip on his roommate merely tightens, fingers balling into fists at the back of his shirt. he can't see those tears due to hug, but that's okay]
[let it all out, Chuuya. Akira's got you]
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Date: 2020-03-07 03:36 am (UTC)I-
[Well, that voice crack betrays him right there. He's definitely crying now.]
Why?
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Date: 2020-03-07 03:55 am (UTC)[at that, Akira pulls back, albeit only slightly. his hands rest on Chuuya's shoulders, and he's still well within his roommate's personal space]
I can't imagine how much you're hurting right now. I wish I could do something about it.
That's why.
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Date: 2020-03-07 04:12 am (UTC)...
[He doesn't pull away from Akira's hands, but he does glance to the side as he reaches up to wipe some tears away. ]
You don't have to. I've always taken care of myself. That's how it is on the street, you know?
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Date: 2020-03-07 04:36 am (UTC)You're not on the street anymore. Are you?
I don't feel obligated. You're just my friend.
[a gentle shoulder squeeze]
That's all there is to it.
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Date: 2020-03-07 05:01 am (UTC)...
It might be a bad idea to say anything, but...]
No, I'm not on the street anymore.
But street or no, nobody's ever hugged me before.
[Just. Putting that out there. So that maybe Akira can understand why it's hard for him.]
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Date: 2020-03-07 05:04 am (UTC)[. . . well, Akira looks a bit sheepish at that. though he doesn't draw Chuuya back in for a hug, he doesn't move his hands from his roommate's shoulders, either]
I. . . ah. Sorry-- I guess I should've asked first.
[but it seemed-- it felt-- like the right thing to do]
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Date: 2020-03-07 05:08 am (UTC)You could've just said you needed a hug, you know.
[YEP. TURNING IT BACK ON AKIRA NOW. Akira looked troubled today anyway, so.]
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Date: 2020-03-07 05:10 am (UTC)[oh my god]
[JUST. . . HUFFS A LAUGH]
Bear with me, I haven't slept in nearly five days. I'm losing it.
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Date: 2020-03-07 05:14 am (UTC)Speaking of which...]
We've got a whole day until the trial. C'mon, Fort Asshole beckons.
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Date: 2020-03-07 05:17 am (UTC)It has a name now?
[but he draws back and stifles a yawn as he makes his way to the fort]
I've never been so happy to see Fort Asshole in my life.
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Date: 2020-03-07 05:25 am (UTC)[Chuuya himself could use a nap, so he'll climb in on his side and curl up under his blankets.]
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Date: 2020-03-07 05:30 am (UTC)[that address doesn't make sense but it's okay AKIRA'S SUPER SPENT. so he's just gonna crawl inside as well and not even bother to curl underneath the blankets before he buries his face into the pillow]
[. . .]
. . . you'll be okay. Right?
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Date: 2020-03-07 05:50 am (UTC)[That second bit, though. With the worst of the morning past him now, he actually feels a little silly for reacting so strongly. He's tougher than that, damnit! He's the one who should be looking out for others.]
Yeah, I'll be fine. I've been doing the 'on my own, taking care of myself' thing since I was seven, so I'm pretty good at it by now.
But are you gonna be okay? No offense, but you're a huge softie.
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Date: 2020-03-07 06:00 am (UTC)[he feels. . . a bit disheartened. a bit helpless. guilty and frustrated and grieving just a little bit, but. . .]
I might be a huge softie, but I'll never stop moving forward.
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Date: 2020-03-07 01:34 pm (UTC)[He actually wants Akira to be okay. Is this progress?]
...hey. Tell me something about yourself. Something I don't know yet.
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Date: 2020-03-08 03:45 am (UTC)[props his head up in his hand, blinking at Chuuya]
Something you don't know?
[what can he share, what can he share. . . ah. he knows]
I had special abilities back home too, actually.
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Date: 2020-03-08 03:57 am (UTC)Yeah? Something to help you with your life as a criminal?
[He's teasing, but.]
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Date: 2020-03-08 04:09 am (UTC)[flops onto his back, but not before wagging his fingers at Chuuya]
For my life as a thief of hearts.
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Date: 2020-03-08 04:20 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-03-08 04:22 am (UTC)[JUST SNORTS]
I'm serious. What I steal back home is hearts. Not in the romantic or literal sense, either.
I steal the hearts of corrupt criminals and make them confess their crimes to the public.
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Date: 2020-03-08 04:35 am (UTC)Right. So how do you steal their hearts, exactly? Therapy sessions?
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Date: 2020-03-08 04:37 am (UTC)[THAT SOUNDS MISERABLE??]
We enter a world called the Metaverse, see out their Palaces, and steal the Treasure from within.
[that's not gonna make any sense to Chuuya at all]
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Date: 2020-03-08 04:42 am (UTC)[Yeah he totally did that to illustrate how lost he is by what Akira just said.]
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Date: 2020-03-08 04:45 am (UTC)The Metaverse is a world made up of human cognition. Palaces are castles created by a person's extremely distorted thoughts and desires.
Say you have a mafia boss who sees the entirety of a city as his personal bank. In the Metaverse, that city would appear to be a part of his bank world, the bank world being his Palace.
And at the center of that bank is the mafia boss's Treasure. The core of his own personal bank world. Remove it, and the entire distortion falls apart.
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